Out in the Big City

Picture 1: As we were walking, Lucy spotted the unmistakeable golden arches and just had to have some french fries and apple juice... Or... Dad just needed to have something to eat that was familiar, even though we never eat it at home. I am not sure which it was...

Picture 2: We continued on the way and spotted a gigantic tower with gold on it and what looked like an angel at the top. Lucy commented that it looked beautiful and that she wanted to climb to the top. I told her Dad was afraid of heights and Mom would have to come back with her sometime and do it.

Picture 3: When we both saw this statue, we looked at each and just shook our heads. We have no idea what this is, but below it was a pool of water and people were throwing each other in the water for some reason. We were not up for that, mostly cause the water smells like rotten eggs.

Picture 4: The first time she has likely ever seen a water fountain. She just stared at it for many minutes and then started laughing. I asked her why she was laughing and she said that the water mist that was hitting her face felt nice....

Picture 5: As we started to make our way back to our apt, Lucy looked up at me and said, "Dad, do you hear that music? It sounds like beat box music." I said that I did but could not see where it was coming from. We rounded a corner and there in front of us was the most unimpressive Break Dancing troop that I have ever seen. Lucy started to clap along to the music but then became bored with the guy who was trying to get money from us for watching. When he asked for money from her Lucy said, "I think you should be paying me for having to watch that attempt at popping and locking."

Picture 6: After seeing the awful attempt at breaking, she tried a few moves of her own... I thought about collecting money, but didn't want people thinking I was pimping my daughter out for her dance moves.

Picture 7: She spotted another fountain that was enchanting and liked the mist in her face again. I told her we can go see the one in downtown Chicago anytime she wants.

Picture 8: We moved along and heard a bunch of chanting and singing and a lot of crazy music being played. We looked across the street and saw some type of protest happening. Lucy once again looked at me and squealed, "Dad, lets go make a memory together by getting tossed in the back of the paddy wagon in a different country." I gave her a stern fatherly look that usually works on Ragen and she just giggled....

Picture 9: I knew that she was her mothers child when we passed by the Zara store and she saw these new pants that she just "Had To Have". I told her that we were on a budget and that she would have to earn her money to spend at the clothing stores. She put her hand on her hip, put out her big lower lip and sulked. I told her that face and lip thing only works for her mother....

Last Day

Well today was our last day in the big city. Lucy and I started off the day by waking up quite late, well, at least she did. I was up at 630 and she slept till 8am today! Guess all the new stuff is tiring her out.

We had some breakfast and then off to the Dr clinic where we needed her to be checked out to ensure the embassy would process our visa and we could be on our way. I was a bit anxious, although not much. There is another couple here now that is having some real challenges with the medical team and I must say that it did give me a few twirls in my stomach as we approached the clinic and went in to see the Dr.

But all was well with her and the Dr signed off on everything pretty quickly. He did an exam and found her to be generally healthy and fit for travel.

We headed back to the apt and had lunch and played for a bit and then went off to see the embassy again and pick up our visa for her. With Dr work up in hand and passport in my pocket, we went inside and ended up running into about 4 other families that were doing the same thing as us. Nice people and all leaving tomorrow as well. One couple from RR but two others not affiliated with RR. We all one by one made our trip up to the window to see the consular officer and one by one came back approved and just waiting the documents.

So we had that done and moved on back to the apt. We just played for a bit, and then laid down in the bed and just lounged for about an hour. She was tired, very tired, but I didn't want her to go to sleep and then not fall asleep till late tonight. We need to be up at 230am to get ready and then leave by 3am. So I want her down and sleeping for a good 6 hours at least.

Then we had a bit of a walk about this late afternoon and early evening. She looked at me when I was feeding her dinner and she just gave me those eyes like, "Dad, lets go check this city center out." I said, Cool. And away we went for a couple of hours. Just walking and letting her see the sites. I always seem to have to remind myself that all of this is so brand new to her and she is seeing just about everything for the first time. It is quite cool to see and can't wait to share more of it with Dena and Ragen when we get home.

My next post will have a few pictures and captions.

So we are leaving in the morning for a long day ahead. First to Frankfurt, then 4 hour layover and then off straight home to Chicago. Looking forward to seeing my gorgeous wife and my beautiful older little girl. I miss them so much.

So until we are home safe across the Atlantic and having Ovengrinders, I bid you farewell. It has been fun and an adventure that will always hold a special place in my heart. Just as the birth of Ragen did....

Rob

COMING HOME TOMORROW!

Well our adoption will be coming to an end finally tomorrow! And an new chapter will begin. I am looking forward to celebrating this homecoming with close friends and family. Please pray for Rob as he ventures on a very long trip by himself with our new daughter. Thank you! XO

The Day of the Tire

Picture 1: Afternoon nap today.
Picture 2: Waking up this morning, sprawled out on bed. Not much room for Dad.
Picture 3: Nico keeping a watchful eye on the tire being fixed.
Picture 4: Just 1/3 of the diapers that you all helped us deliver. There were two more huge stacks like this one. We can't thank all the people enough that chipped in. What a blessing it was to be the delivery boy!


Quite a day yesterday. It was our Gotcha Day as they call it, when we were able to take Lucy out of the orphanage for good. And what a day it was, for more than just that reason.

The day started out quite normal, got up and did my thing with Lucy in the morning. Nothing real new there. Just played, had a bite to eat with her and then took some pictures around the grounds to keep as memories. I also was able to persuade the caregivers and nannies to allow me to take a picture of them. This took some real persuasion, but I finally got them to do it. It was a good one too, glad they obliged.

Headed back to the hotel, by way of the grocery store where I wanted to pick up a few things. I wanted to pick up a few items of food for Lucy and then also wanted to grab some toys that I could bring with to the big city so she would have stuff to play with. Cab driver as always was great. One time this past week I wanted to go to a local store to by a few small blow up pools for the orphanage as it has been so so hot here. He not only took me there, but walked me upstairs to the shop and told them what I wanted. Really a great guy. Just goes to show that the other ignorant driver we had previous missed out on all the fares for the last many days because of his sideways view of the world.

I waited then at the hotel for about 4 hours as Nico was coming to get me at the hotel first and then we would go to the orphanage to get Lucy. He arrived about 430 and tells me that he had to get one of his tires fixed. Apparently he was with another family before leaving to come and get me and he hit the curb and busted open the tire. He and Joel Golden did a quick change to the spare and then he got the broken one fixed and put back on. So I loaded up, asked him to stop at the hotel so that we could pick up another round of diapers for the orphanage with the money that Dena has raised on the Chip In. That woman Dena and how God works through her and her friends on Facebook just lights my heart up. She is such an incredible wife and has changed my life in so many ways seeing her heed to Gods small whispers. She really is so special to me. Everyday I thank God that he gave me the opportunity to live life with her and make me a better man for being with her.

So we pick up $400 worth of diapers and load them in. Nico pulls out of the parking lot and misjudges the curb a bit and BOOM, there goes the tire again. The same one from earlier. So we both jump out and do our best NASCAR pit stop work and change the tire back to the spare he had, while parked on the main street of town. We did it pretty quick and were on our way, dirty and sweaty to pick up Lucy.

We got to the orphanage, signed some papers, brought up the diapers and then were off to see Lucy and take her away for good. The caregivers on duty were very nice and actually wanted to do a quick bath with her and put her new clothes I brought with on her. I was going to jump in and take care of it, but they insisted and I think it was there way of saying goodbye to her so I didn't get in the way. So they took her in, gave her a quick sponge bath and then put on her new little one piece jumper that was from a box of Ragen's old stuff. So it wasn't really new, but it was new to her. It fit perfect and we got some pictures and then hoped in the car. Away we went.

Nico wanted to try to stop and see if we could fix the tire again, just in case we blew out another tire. It would be bad to have a flat in the middle of no where and not have a spare. I whole heartedly agreed. So we stopped and 30 min later, we had the fixed tire back on the van and the spare in the back again.

We were humming along the road and it was quite bumpy. This road for some reason is just a mess. Imagine in the US when they are fixing a road and they strip off the top layer of asphalt and there is the really bumpy, hole filled under layer that is just a nightmare to drive on. Well, that is the first hour of this road from our small city to the big city. About 20 min in, we hit a big hole and BANG! Yep, you guessed it, again, the tire that we just fixed blew out. Thankfully that spare was still in great condition and so Nico and I manned our stations to get to work. It literally took us no more than 7-10 min to make it happen. Forget NASCAR, we are going FORMULA ONE baby! Back in the care we went and off to the big city.

We arrived about 9pm in the big city and got settled in to our apt quickly. Lucy was supposed to go down at 9pm, so I cleaned her up, gave her some juice and off to bed we went. I laid with her for a bit and she was very restless. Just like Ragen is. Finally I thought I caught a whiff of a smell that is all to familiar, yep, my first poop duty with Lucy. And of course it was no little simple one. This kid goes all out to spoil me on my first duty with a load that would make an adult proud!

Back to bed we went and about 45 min later she finally konked out. She slept great though all night long. Again, she is restless to some degree, but no different than Ragen is at night. I think getting her Tonsils and Adnoids out will really help her get much more restful sleep.

What a day. I saw it as a great adventure and was so thrilled that I was blessed to be a part of it. Would had it been easier and less sweaty and dirty to not have the interesting twists? Sure, but not nearly as memorable!

Rob

Gotcha Day Part 2

Well, we are now officially out of the orphanage and back in the big city for a couple of days. Was a pretty crazy day yesterday, but I will save that for another post later today. Need to get ready for the Embassy visit today. Wanted to share pictures of leaving the orphanage and saying goodbye to all the nice people that have been there for us the past month we have been going through this journey.
Enjoy....

Rob

Gotcha Day Part 1

This morning was my last official visit to the orphanage where I had to leave Lucy behind. I arrived at 9am this morning after visiting the bank to change a little money and just took it all in for one last time that way. The taxi dropped me off and I strolled over to the groupa area where she was waiting outside with the rest of the crew. They turned her stroller around and she looked up to see me and reached out both arms as if to ask me to pick her up. It was like she knew that today was the day that she was leaving and she was ready.
We had a nice few hours together, ate some yogurt and had some fruit star cracker things that Dena packed for her to try. Then we did a walk around the whole orphanage so I could put on video the whole place. I got a few pictures of the nannies and then went back to the taxi to go grab a few things and head back to the hotel to ready for my 4pm pick up. Two hours away from that time and just started to realize the the journey is coming to a close in this city. There are still a number of steps to go before Sat, but one day at a time!

Here are some pictures of today and yesterday.

Rob

Another Video July 19th

Another video shot today of Lucy....
I think she will really like the parks we have by our house and in the general area!

Still super hot here, but I hear from Dena that it is no different back home. 90+ degrees here today with very little wind to make it more comfortable.

Heard from our facilitators today that looks like things are lining up ok with the passport situation to allow us to have all our paperwork and meetings done so we can leave on Sat. The plan is to leave here around 530am on Sat morning, transfer in Frankfurt Germany to another plane and then be home somewhere around 1pm or so on Sat in Chicago. Not looking too far in advance right now, but that is the plan as of today.

Lucy is doing well and happy as can be. God is really doing great things over here, even though there are also some hard things to see some days. Yesterday I saw my first child with Cerebal Palsy that is here. It was hard to know that he was here and that he was just dumped here by someone. But at the same time, I witnessed the nurses/nannies being really great with him. He was on a blanket with all the other kids and he was laying on his side and they were playing with him, showing him attention and affection. The sad part will be when they transfer him in a few years. He will likely die very soon after that. It truly makes my heart break when I think of the future that some of these kids will have.

But, all we can all do is our best to make an impact, in whatever way that God leads us to do that. For some it is adoption, for others it is compassion missionary work, for others it is teaching little ones in school or sunday school and for still others it is giving of their resources to help others. All of us can help in our own way. And that is the beauty of how God made us to be. All talented or gifted to do different things to help each other and love each other!

Video Of Lucy

Here is a video of Lucy shot the other day....

Pictures- July 19th 2011

Here are some pictures of Lucy for you all to look at. I have taken a number of pictures in the last few days of the surroundings and the oprhanage so that we can share with you all at some point. But for now, lets just start with the little bundle of joy we call Lucy....

Videos

Here is a video I shot today while in the car. The audio is suspect because of the open windows. It was 90 degrees here today and the air conditioning on the van stopped working. So we had to have the windows down when driving for sure....

Another Day of Driving- By Rob

Well, it was another day today of driving. Now that we had Lucy's Birth Certificate changed, we needed to take the round trip 4 hour drive again today, this time with Lucy to get her passport paperwork all sorted out. Was not sure how she would react, but I was just going with the flow.

The morning started out a bit on the rocky side, but not everything can go perfectly smooth. We had a glitch in the paperwork that delayed us getting going this morning. We had to call the director of the orphanage directly at 8am on a Sat morning. I am pretty sure we got her either out of bed or out of her robe. She showered quickly and we picked her up at her home, then went to the orphanage to finish some paperwork that passport agency would need. I picked up Lucy and off into the car we went. Yulia called me earlier and asked if I would be ok with Lucy on my own and said the orphanage was willing to supply a caregiver for the trip just in case. I politely said no as I wanted to give it a shot by myself. She seemed to be fine with me yesterday and I have done alot of parenting to a child in teh last 4 years. I was very certain I would be fine. But, they insisted and actually Nico insisted as well, so I backed down and let her come along. Wanted everyone to feel comfortable.

So off we went. Lucy did great on the way there. She slept for about an hour and then we played together for about an hour. The caregiver and Nico talked the whole way there. Once we got to the passport place, we were there for about 30 min. They took her picture, one shot and done. They then sent the info and pictures to the capital city for processing. I took a few min to feed Lucy some juice and a banana and then we got back going again. The caregiver really didn't do much, she wanted to be involved and help, but I was pretty forward about this being my job and wanting to show Lucy that I was the caregiver. In a few short days I will be the only one and I wanted to get her used to this today. But the caregiver I think was very good for Nico. Because on the way back two hours more, it was hot, very hot and Nico was having a hard time with getting tired. Don't blame him one bit. I get crazy tired driving at all and then add in the sun and it doubles. So, she was great cause they talked alot again and it kept him going after all the driving he was doing the last two days. What a trooper that guy is. Wonderful driver, but an even better person!

The day was pretty uneventful. Got the shots done, headed back to home town, dropped off Lucy and the caregiver and then back to the hotel. A long day again for all involved, especially Nico driving all that way again. But we had a successful day and in fact a very smooth couple days. We got the birth cert done yesterday and the passport stuff done today. We now will wait on the passport to be complete. This should be Wed of this coming week. Then Nico will drive to pick up the passport and then come over to pick up Lucy and I. So, if all goes according to plan, we should be in the big city Wed nigh, Embassy on Thurs for appt and the doctor clinic visit, Friday we pick up the travel visa and Sat morning we head home on an early morning flight. That is the plan. But as Dena always says, you know how to make God laugh, have a plan!

So I will continue to just go with the flow and depend on our incredible in country team to make things work. I just can not rave enough about how hard they work and how they do an incredible job at keeping up with all the madness. God does very special work through these people here and I thank God every night that we have them on our side!

On the Road Again- By Rob

So I am back here in the eastern part of Europe to try to finish everything up to bring Lucy home as soon as possible. I took off from home without my partner in crime on Wed evening and flew the same flight that Dena and I flew coming over the first time, British Airways. On a side note, I have never flown BA before we started on this journey and have been so very impressed with their service and their accomodations. They are really a top notch airline compared to the airlines in the states these days.

I landed on Thursday at 3pm, had a few hiccups getting connected back up with the team over here, but managed to sync up and had the pleasure of meeting Eugene for the first time. He gave me a lift over to an apt in the city, not far from where we first stayed. It was on the 15th floor of a old, dingy looking building on the main street. For those of you that have been over here before, you will understand the strange appearance of the buildings from the outside and even in the hallways inside. But also will understand that the inside of the apartments are very nice and always clean. The view from the 15th floor was incredible though and the 12 hours I spent there was nice. I was able to grab a nice pizza at a place that Dena and I were turned on to by the Golden family and met a nice young woman from the US that was working there for 2 months, she was sitting next to me in the place. We talked for a little while, I told her about our journey and she told me a bit about her summer internship for a law firm there. I wished her a good night after finishing up my pizza and away I went to the apt for some much needed shut eye. It had been about 30 hours since I last slept. So I hit the pillow and was out till the alarm rang at 515am ready for Nico to pick me up and head to the little town where Lucy's orphanage is.

Nico and I spent the better part of the entire day on the road going from this little town to a much larger regional town and then back in order to sort out Lucy's new birth certificate. The two towns were two hours apart. So we went from big city to small city, two hours. Then small city to regional city, another two hours, then back to small city, another two hours. At least 6 hours driving yesterday and a number of hours in between waiting for paperwork and agencies to help us.

Sprinkled into all of this driving were a few nice fun moments yesterday. The first one was when we arrived in the small city, we were able to stop at the orphanage for about 15 min. I bribed Nico to let me see Lucy for 10 min and it was great. I was so very scared and anxious in coming back here by myself that Lucy would forget me and we would need to start at square one together. I prayed so hard about this and asked so many others for prayer on this as well. God provided! As soon as she saw me, she seemed to remember me and after a few well placed kisses on her neck and cheeks and also some bouncing around she started to laugh and giggle. It was such a blessing and a definite answered prayer!

After that though, the fun parts were a bit more goofy and random to say the least. After we waited around for a couple of hours to start the birth cert process in the regional city, Nice and I decided to have a quick bite to eat at a local restaurant. We talked in and it was a dream room for my Dad. Heads of animals everywhere! I guess it was called the Hunters Restaurant. Good name, it had stuffed animals and heads of animals from every continent. Deer, Moose, Tiger skin, rabbits, bear etc... They even had a few nice fish mounted, one that looked to be a Northern Pike, about 15 pounder by the looks of it. It was just a random place to find this restaurant, but they had a cold tall beer for me and actually had a very nice meal to go along with it. All for something like $10. Can't beat the prices here.

As we were at the restaurant, we were talking about many things. We were talking about how Nico often times spends the night in the office of the team because it is too far to drive home. We were talking about what he had eaten that morning and he started to tell me that he had picked up some "bush legs" the night before and had one that morning as left overs. I said, what are "bush legs". Not sure if this is just him or not, but he went on to tell me that people in the country are now refering to chicken wings or legs as "bush legs" because some years ago now, when George Bush came into office, this country started buying alot of chicken from the US so now they say they are going to have a bush leg instead of a chicken leg for dinner. Like I said, random!

As we finished up the paperwork and headed home, we had some choice encounters with the animal life in this country. As many that have been here will understand, people tend to have a number of animals and livestock that roam their land grazing and feeding. You will drive by a whole row of houses and see cows out front of the house near the road or goats or chickens or ducks just out making a day of it. Most of the time the large animals are tied to a stake in the ground and the owner will come and move the stake during the day to let them graze more. But this day a cow was on the loose. We were driving about 120 kmh (74 mph) down this road and started to slow down as we saw some stopping tail lights ahead. As we approached we noticed that people were swerving and stopping to avoide something and then we saw him, just a nice big old cow stopped dead in the middle of this major road. Cars were trying to avoid him but he was not going anywhere and I looked at Nico like, What In the World and all he could do was laugh. As we were driving by him finally, we saw people on the other side of the street that were still stuck with him yelling and screaming and trying to do everyhting to get him going. He wasnt having it though. A big ol cow stopping traffic. What a trip.

But he was not the only one stopping traffic that day. About 20 min later, we again were stopped briefly by a flock of ducks that had taken up residence for a short while on the road. And not wild ducks like mallards but domesticated ducks that are used to cars and traffic and no well and good that no one would be running them over. So they just stood their ground, no matter how many times Nico honked the horn, they were going to eat what they came to eat. They finished eating and looked up at us with what looked like a smirk and waddled off. Nico gave them a good verbal dressing down and we were on our way again.

We crashed finally at the hotel that Dena and I stayed at for 12 days. We arrived about 8pm, exhausted and ready to hit the hay. I emailed for a bit, tried calling Dena and after no luck with her, I crashed.

Long day, but definite memories were created today.

WRAP IT UP!

Well it's time to wrap up this adoption! Rob will be leaving tomorrow (Wednesday) at 5:00 pm for the "U" to finish up the process and bring her home. Please pray for him for safe and EASY travels. Rob is such a trooper. I love him for being such a 'hands-on' daddy. Nothing like throwing himself head first into becoming a father to a toddler he barely knows...alone. I am praying that Lucy is good to him while they are together and traveling...LOL! She seems like a delightful child and if she is anything like Ragen was when she was 2 1/2, there should be no problems. Thanks you for your prayers! xoxoxo

INTRODUCING THE NEW MISS USA!!!

Sad But True- By Rob

Just wanted to write today to talk about two things that are the unfortunate, sad but true parts of being a part of the adoption process here in the eastern part of Europe. There have been many rewarding, incredible, happy, loving and overwhelmingly joyful days in this part of the world for us, but the last few days we have also seen the ugly side which makes us incredibly sad.

For the better part of the last 10 days that we have been in this smallish city, 50,000 people, we have had a great taxi driver that takes us to and from our hotel to the orphanage every day. He picks us up at 845 to go to the orphanage, then picks us up at 11 at the orphanage to go to the hotel and then back to the orphanage at 345 and back to the hotel at 6. For this work, we pay him a nice wage and a wage that would make any taxi driver in this city extremely happy for the actual level of work that they engage in by driving us 10 min one way. Our taxi driver for 8 days was like most people that we have observed here, always frowning, unhappy looking, never says hello, depressed and seemingly angry at all around him. He looked like he is about 60 years old or so and been around the taxi business a while. But like I said, he was always on time and even stopped more than once to wait for us at the grocery store or a pizza place. And we paid him nicely for his promptness as we appreciated his diligence.

Then Sunday came along and everything changed in an instant. On Sunday late in teh afternoon when he came to pick us up at the orphanage, we were walking by him to bring her back to her group and for the first time, he saw her directly. He knew that we were comign to visit a child, but had no idea that she had Down Syndrome, or as they call it here, she was an Invalid. Seemingly all was normal as we jumped in his little toyota car and off we went to the pizza place to have an evening meal. We normally do not eat out and eat groceries from the store, but that night we wanted a little more substantial meal. We had agreed for him to pick us back up an hour later and as that time approached we made sure we got up and headed outside to meet him. We waited and waited and 20 min went by and no driver. We finally headed back to the other taxi area and took a random car back to the hotel but were perplexed by our drivers absence. Then the next morning rolled around and he again did not show up for our normal 845 pick up and we thought something was wrong. We were going to be late so we called another driver to bring us and as we were driving by the downtown area where the taxis sit, there was our driver, sitting waiting for a fare.

To make a long story short, with the money he was being paid, the ease of the job he was doing, the certain fare he was getting four times a day and the mysterious missed pickups on Sunday, we concluded that after he saw Lucy had Down Syndrome, he didn't want anything to do with us. See the older generation here does not see those that are disabled as a joy to love and behold as they would any other child. No, here, children with disabilities are treated with contempt and shame and espeically by the older generation of people. We have even heard that most of the older generation believes that they will be cursed by God by coming into contact with people that have disabilities. Or that Americans are coming to this place to adopt children with disabilities because they are going to harvest them for body parts and organs. I know that it sounds unthinkable and absolutely medieval in thinking, but we have now experienced this sad and unfortunate belief system up front and in person. We of course can not officially confirm it, but all the logic points to the sad reality of this older mans warped view of the world.

The second sad reality that we have come across just today was not our own, but the story we heard from another american couple we just met today for dinner. We just learned of their arrival from another couple we know in town and so we set up a dinner tonight, pizza again, so we could meet and talk. Nice to see another native English speaking couple for a few mintues. Anyway, we were listening to their story about adopting a typical 5 year old little girl from the ophanage in town. Apparently all has been going well with getting to know this little girl that seemingly has not been able to find a family that she likes. See, here in this country, apparently they trust the children to decide if they want to go with the adoptive parents or not. They trust 4 and 5 year olds to know what is in their best interest for some reason. Most 4-5 year olds can barely figure out if they want orange juice or apply juice let along make a life altering decision about where and who they will spend the rest of their life with.

Anyway, this little girl had been getting to know this couple and all had been going very well. Then today, they went to see her and at one point in the visit the little girl starting crying very hard and was just breaking down in front of them. Luckily, they had their facilitator there to help translate with teh little girl and ask her what was wrong. Here is where it gets unbelievable. The little girl was crying because she really liked the couple, but one of the nannies had told her some horrible things about the couple and that she should not take them as her parents because they are not good people. The reasons why this nanny would do such a thing to a little girl that needs a home are just unthinkable, but according to the local facilitator for this couple there are a number of nannies that do things like this because they don't want the kids to leave. Because if too many of the kids leave, then they will be out of work and not be able to have their job.

Again, I know that this stuff just seems unthinkable and could only be a sick script in a movie, but we are seeing this stuff first and second hand here and it is scary at best and incredibly disturbing at worst. It makes us both so sad to see children being discriminated against and hurt by adults that are so ignorant and selfish. These kids deserve so much more than they are getting and I can only hope and pray that as we all tell these stories and help people see the realities that exist in teh world, that we will slowly start to break down the barriers and walls that lock people in ignorant mentaliites like these.

I would just ask that you say a simple prayer for people here tonight. Not a prayer of judgement but a prayer of grace that God would keep bringing people to this place to open minds and hearts. That God would radically bless those facilitiators that work here to protect their work as they open minds and hearts. And a prayer of hope that God would continue to impress on the hearts and minds of his followers the needs of the widows and the orphans. Not just in our own backyards, but in the places where the least of these are truly the least of these!

LUCY MARIA SADER

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY...A VERY HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!

Today was the FIRST FULL day of sunshine that we have had since we have been here in the Ukraine. A beautiful day. It's also the 4th of July back home. I'm sure our families are all enjoying the day with each other BBQing, swimming, being outside, maybe even thinking of Rob and I half way across the world :-) Today we are missing our families, but we had some important things to do that has taken us away from them all. Today is very important because today a very special little girl has become an American...on this 4th of July. Today, I have not just one child that I love with all my being, but today I have two children that I love with everything that I have. Today a judge said yes! Today a judge even asked us if we had a camera so that we could all take a photo together as a memory...our facilitator said that he's never done that. So even though we are a world away, and missing our families, missing the fireworks, missing the food (oh the food!!), missing the swimming, etc., it's all worth it because today the sun shined oh so bright ALL day, today a very special little girl became an American, today a special little girl became my daughter, today her name is legally Lucy Maria Sader...TODAY SHE IS AN ORPHAN NO MORE!!! Today God is very pleased.

Marsha and the Rain- By Rob

When I was a kid growing up in the thriving metropolis of Ham Lake Minnesota, I watched cartoons and kids shows just like any normal kid. In fact, I remember watching my fair amount of Soap Operas (Days of Our Lives) as well in the summer time, maybe a story for a different blog....

But one show in particular that I really loved for a number of years was the Brady Bunch. In fact, I think I watched every possible episode of that show over the course of a few years from when I was 12 years old till I was say 15. In fact, I even remember mowing the lawn one summer day, looking forward to watching the Brady Bunch later that afternoon and daydreaming about the episode that was going to be on. I had seen it so much that I was actually daydreaming about the exact episode that would come on later that day. Strange I know....

I saw the early years when they just got married and became the clan that they were and Davey Jones visited the house. I remember the mid years when they went to Hawaii and had crazy accidents because of the mystic figurine that they picked up by mistake. I remember the little bit later years when Cousin Oliver came on to the scene in a big way and worked his way into our hearts with that mop of hair. And I remember the classic episodes where Kitty Carryall was taken by the dog, the kids formed a singing group and of course who could remember Marsha, Marsha Marsha episode. Of course this was when Jan was so jealous of Marsha and all the love she got from boys and people in general. I think everyone remembers that episode.

Since we have been coming to the orphanage to pick up Lucy everyday for our visits, the funniest thing happens every time we get there, the nannies start calling out Marsha, Marsha Marsha. Don't imagine Jan Brady doing it, but imagine a 50 year old nanny in a eastern european accent screaming out these words. We just bust up laughing everytime they say it. Apparently the name Maria, which is Lucy's real name, is pronounce Marsha in their language so they just call out her name every time we pick her up. But it always carries Dena and I back to the Brady Bunch when they do it. I would have thought they would pronounce her name like any other country in the world, Maria. But apparently not. It is a great way to start the day though. Dena and I look at each and giggle everytime they do it.

Rain.... For those of you in Texas that might be reading this blog, please skip this part because you are getting killed by a crazy dry spell apparently. But we are just so sick and tired of Rain. Ever since we arrived in our town last Saturday the 25th, we have been getting killed with Rainy day after Rainy day. It stops here and there for a few minutes but overall, the day just gets eaten up by rain. Funny thing is though that it seems that for the two hours in the AM and the PM that we have our time with Lucy, it stops, then it starts again. It stops just long enough for us to pick her up and bring her to a little shelter out of the orphanage where we can play with her adn walk around a bit. Then when we drop her off it always seems to pick back up again. It is amazing. I talked with our in country team the other day briefly on the phone and asked if this was a normal summer and they gasped NO! They said that this is very uncharacteristic of the summer here and we just happened to hit a spell with this horrible weather. The good part is that we get the non rain times when we see Lucy and I guess that is all that matters. God gives us just enough of a dry time per day to see her and that is enough for us.

We have court on Monday the 4th of July. We are excited and looking forward to the day. We appreciate all prayers and positive thoughts on this day so that God would provide a smooth and delay free court day. Someone posted on Dena's Facebook page the other day that it was cool that Lucy will officially become a member of our American family the same day that we celebrate our American existence. Pretty symbolic and a great day to be an American!!!

BOUNCING AND BELLIES

Rocking Lucy to sleep.

TO BE HONEST....

To be honest, I was so scared that not only Lucy wouldn't like me, but I was even more scared that I wouldn't attach to her in the same way a mother bonds to her birth child. Some of you know me pretty well, and others, not so much. I have admitted in the past that I am not very maternal. I do not gravitate towards children, and they really don't gravitate to me. Most of my adult life thus far has never consisted of the mission to have children, and adopting was NEVER an option. How in the world could I love someone else's child??? Just not going to happen. Well I am morphing into the woman that God wants me to be, I am open and letting him work in my heart and mind. Granted, I have a love for people, all people, but children have always been a little different. Ragen came along and turned my world upside down. I have become a "Momma Bear", a mother that would die in an instant for her child without hesitation...I would give anything for her. After learning about all the orphans with DS that are suffering in Eastern Europe, I couldn't help but think of my Ragen. What if it were her? What if she were born there? What if, what if, what if...hence the decision to adopt. But all along my biggest fear was, I won't bond, love, attach to this child because she is "not from me". It took God giving me a biological child to really and truly love children, all children, and especially a special love for children with DS. Lucy is not from my body, so what will I do if I do not "love" her like I love Ragen??? The fear was really overwhelming. I never have really talked about it openly, not even with Rob. I was embarrassed and ashamed...I was afraid of friends and family thinking, "why in the world is she adopting then?" But I trusted God. I knew that not only would He not leave us through this entire process, but I also trusted that He would provide EVERYTHING we would need to bring this child home, into a LOVING home. We all depend on God for the financial obligations, to make this process a smooth one, BUT, I wonder how many others might feel the way I did/do and that fear keeps them from taking a leap of faith, and really depending on God for EVERYTHING, including our feelings? I've prayed so hard through this process for God to provide a bond, a mother/child love, a love that I have for Ragen. I prayed non-stop when we landed on this soil, especially before we were to meet her. The minute I laid eyes on this child, God gave me the exact feeling that I had the minute I gave birth to Ragen. I loved her the exact same way. I loved her the minute I saw her and my love is growing each and every day. This provision from God has got to be the greatest gift He has given me throughout this entire process. I can't wait to see her, to touch her, to hug her, to give her kisses, to laugh with her, to feed her, to play with her, to hold her, to tell her I love her....all those things that I LOVE to do with Ragen. I am amazed that God has changed me so much, and He has provided EVERYTHING that we need to make our home a happy, nourishing, loving, God-filled environment. Thank you Lord. Thank you for my precious angels and I am so looking forward to see what you have in store for our future as a family!

Lessons from God- By Rob

It has been quite a journey that we have undertaken in the last 10 months. We started out by just thinking about what it would be like to add a little one to our family. Then we started taking the classes for adoption and sitting in a small room on uncomfortable chairs for two days straight listening to a lady that new everything about adoption and trying to keep up taking notes. Then we started with the first meeting with the homestudy and continued to work on that homestudy for what seemed like a lifetime. Others around us were completing their homestudies in 1 or 2 months and ours went on for what seemed like a year, but was really 4 months or so. We had documents signed by doctors, by lawyers, by friends and family and then had them all notarized, some of them more than once. We had one set of documents that we had to re do 4 different times. It felt like the paperwork would never ever stop rolling in. We had great people helping us at our agency Reece's Rainbow and we had great people in Chicago helping us get all the paperwork done and notarized.

So the paperwork finally got all done, checked and then double checked to ensure that it was exactly what we needed to send for final review. But before that we needed to put a state appostille on all the paperwork downtown CHicago. And, oh yes, don't forget the frantic call we got from our US based helper that said that we had an incorrect document and we needed to get a new one OVER NIGHTED so that they could re attach to our Dossier and re submit for approval.

So for about 10 months, it was all about the process. It was all about paper and UPS and notary and appostille and dreams and homestudies and roadblocks. It was all about getting there. Then today happened.....
We finally made it to the city where our little one has lived for the better part of the last two years of her life. She was born to a family here in this town of about 70,000 people. She was given up in the hospital at birth by her mother because they were afraid of the reputation and stigmatism that they would get from having a child with Down Syndrome. They even went so far as to register the birth of their child in a completely different city so that people would never know that they had a child that was what they refer to as an "Invalid". Think about that for a second. This mother and father didn't only not want their child, but they did everything they possibly could to make sure that no one would ever know that the child they had was different. They worked pretty hard to make sure that their baby would never be tracked back to them. For what reason they did all this work, we will never know the absolute reason. But it is safe to say that they did not want others around them to think that they were somehow cursed by God because they had a child that was different. Or they did not want the rest of their life to be scared in their community by a child that was different. My first thought for people like this is pity and sadness for such selfishness.
Yesterday was a crazy day of running around and meeting her for the first time. But today was the first day that we had one on one time with her for 2 hours, 2 seperate times during the day. We were with her from 930-11am and then again from 4-6pm. This morning from 930-11 was a really great time for Dena but not so much for me. Lucy Maria Sader was not used to seeing men before and was very scared of me this morning. She really had a negative reaction to me and really clung to Dena for the whole time. I kept telling myself that it was just because that she never sees male figures in the orphanage and that the familiar female touch and voice was much more soothing and comforting to her. But no matter what I told myself, I could not holdback the sadness and frustration that I had because she was not taking to me at all. I felt sad and embarrased and frustrated and disappointed and even a few times felt like I should just stay back at the hotel while Dena goes to develop the bond with her at first and then I could come later. I have never in my life had a child be scared of me like she was and it was just really sad to my heart.

After we got through the play time we were on the way back to the hotel and I was trying to explain to Dena what it feels like to have that happen. She was not really understanding what it felt like but at the same time trying to reassure me the best she could. We had a small lunch together in our room and just briefly spoke about it some more. I could not shake the feeling and it did not feel good at all.

Then something hit me hard and very specifically. It was a jolt or a whisper from God and the only thing I can remember hearing in my head was "It is not about you". As I heard this whisper from God, I said it outloud to Dena and we both just kind of let it go. But I thought about it internally for another hour or so and it just kept hitting me, "It is not about you". As I processed the whisper it became so clear to me that all of my sadness or frustration or embarrassment was all wrapped up in what I needed and not what Lucy needed. I was focused on all the hard work that we had done to get to this point and was looking for the big payoff with a great connection immediately with Lucy and for her to just love us both from the very beginning. I was looking for my needs to be met and not thinking about what Lucy needed or what God was asking of me. What an absolute infant I had been in thinking this way and not thinking about Lucy first. Then I prayed to God for peace and asked for him to meet me right where I was, a child looking for forgiveness for being selfish and self absorbed.
Then later in the day after our second meeting in the afternoon went so much better and Lucy was more open to me, I started thinking about her biological mother and father. I started thinking about how selfish I was and not thinking about Lucy's needs and how judgemental I had been yesterday in thinking about her mother and father and how they were so selfish in their needs to give her up. Some might say that their selfishness was so much more horrible than mine. But selfishness is selfishness. Lucy has had a short life in an orphanage because of the selfishness of two people and what God was telling me and reminding me of today was that she has had plenty of selfishness in her life. Lucy does not need any more adults in her life that are thinking about their wants and needs more than hers. She needs a father and a mother that are focused on and determined to provide a life for her on this earth full of SELFLESS love.
Today was not only a day of joy and love because we had a full day with our new little girl. But it was also a day of learning and humility for me, her father. I learned once again that judging others is not my job, but only Gods job. And I also learned again that this life is not about me. It is about connecting my heart to the heart of God, it is about giving grace for mistakes and it is about giving my life to others in a way that will bring glory to God and bring me that much closer to God's heart!
If we are listening, God is always teaching.....

WE GOT IT!

The Lord heard us all and we got our referral TODAY! Tomorrow we see our daughter for the first time. It has been a long road, but a road that I would go down again and again...we still have a way to go, but God has seen us through it all, He won't leave us now. I think this is really just the beginning.

We are tired and have to get up at 5:00am to be on the road to Lucy's region by 6:00.

I will post pics as soon as I can....I know YOU are ALL WAITING! SO AM I!

Until tomorrow...

OUR APPOINTMENT WENT WELL, PRAYING WE GET THE REFERRAL TODAY!

Well, as everyone that has gone before us, our appointment was no different than anyone else. It was very fast and to top it off, we were late! But it wasn't our fault. The woman handling the referral wasn't even going to ask us any questions until I mentioned that the one photo of Lucy, looked like Ragen...then she asked how many children we had. Then there was a second photo and I gasped. I tried not to seem alarmed, but Yulia could tell that I was. She told me the photo was older. But still, I cannot get that image out of my mind and won't be able to until I see her with my own two eyes. She was RAIL THIN. She looked starved. It was heartbreaking. But it is the reality of many children with disabilities that live on this side of the world. Seeing that photo confirmed with all my might that I will never stop advocating for these children...and that if God puts it in our hearts again, we WILL be back again to adopt.

We are back at our apartment and Yulia told us to be ready by 3. We are all hoping and praying that we will be able to pick up the referral this afternoon after 3. If we get it today, we will travel to her region tomorrow and see her TOMORROW! Oh, I am praying non-stop that God will make this happen for us. If we cannot pick it up this afternoon, we will have to wait to see her on Wednesday.

Praying and waiting....